Have you ever come across this feeling? You are surrounded by people and you feel alone, helpless and frightened. Whatever they are saying is just a babble in your ears. You are hating every thing around you. Want to curl up someplace and leave the unbelievable sadness behind you. You can’t escape from the surroundings around you. The feeling is ghastly and terrible. Even the breath you are taking seems a great effort and while you are taking it you choke. Believe me it is a nightmare.
This was 3rd Aug 2012, the second day of my husband’s death. Day before my children and I had brought his dead body to his ancestral village. His wish was to be buried beside his mother’s feet. We buried him in the evening. I felt utterly alone. The husband who was my Rock wasn’t there anymore. Fate had removed him from my clutching hands. My hands were empty. I had nothing to hold onto. How did I know that he will suddenly give up on life. I thought I will still have, some time with him. Time which was never meant to be.