If You Leave

I did my leaving two and a half years ago. I left my birth country for an adoptive one. It was heart wrenching. The sheer feeling of loss which settles around one’s heart never goes away. You may bury it in the bottom but it resurfaces now and then trying to haunt you.

Next thing on my agenda is a home here which is going beyond my reach day by day. When I came here prices were still reasonable. My son pulled me short in asking why are you in such a hurry to buy?  My money dwindled due to lawyer fees and other expenditures, and now it’s not enough to buy a home. One reason of my watching Fixer Upper. 

Homes I like are out of my reach. In my range are only run down ones which requires copious amount of money and energy to make them right. Two days ago my left leg below the knee joint is giving me awful pain and I am dreading going to a doctor to find out the cause — added money drain.

One thing I wanted to ask was: Why have builders stopped making smaller houses like two beds and baths?  People like me who would like to live alone would like smaller places. Condos have high maintenance taxes, and are certainly a no-no.

Away from Houston there are places where one can find decent homes and less taxes. Going further away will be another cause for heart pain because I will be reduced to seeing my son once a year.  Another decision to make…..


If You Leave

Life is a series of beginnings and endings. We leave one job to start another; we quit cities, countries, or continents for a fresh start; we leave lovers and begin new relationships. What was the last thing you contemplated leaving? What were the pros and cons? Have you made up your mind? What will you choose?


3 thoughts on “If You Leave”

  1. I wonder if it’s possible ever to “forget”. I still miss the town I lived in before I moved here ten years ago. And it’s in the same country!
    It’s bigger than this one, have more of everything.
    But mostly I miss the surroundings. The roads I used to bike, the seashore stretching out on the westcoast miles after miles after miles….
    Thank you for sharing your experience!

    Liked by 1 person

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