Category Archives: Life

The Empty Jar

Whenever I’m going someplace in a hurry, I find the tea jar empty. I wish sometimes Son should fill it, but he has never done it. He uses the last tea bag, and that’s it.

I had an appointment at the Cardiologist, so woke up to get ready. It was then that Son told me that he needed me to make something for him to be eaten at Iftari, as he probably wouldn’t get home on time. He should have mentioned it last night. I would have gotten up earlier.

Needless to say I couldn’t let him go hungry after a full day fasting. That’s a mother conscience. He forgets that I do need time to prepare something for him to eat. Thankfully I did have samosa dough, and the filling for it lying in the fridge. Quickly I made a few samosas for him. Together with chat, and dates, he could break his fast at iftar time.

Looking at the watch I had fifteen minutes to have a cup of tea. It was then I found out the tea jar was empty. Son as usual had the last tea bag. The last person who uses it should fill it, but Son never does. I had to fill it, and made myself a cup of tea. I like my tea to get a bit cooler to take a sip. When one is in a hurry time speeds away. Leaving everything aside, I left for my appointment, barely reaching on time for it.

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Who I Saw

My likes/dislikes gets radically changed over a period of time, but some remain constant. For example I still like Di (Princess Diana), Harrison Ford, Brendan Fraser, Ellen DeGeneres, and so on. Dislikes which were likes before are Mel Gibson, Alec Baldwin, Kristen Stewart, Clint Eastwood, Oprah …..

I have never met any famous persons in real life, except like the Pakistani actor Muhammad Ali, and Indian actor Daleep Kumar. I was excited to see BF (Brendan Fraser) during my trip from Boston to Dallas via New York. Son, and I were parting ways there. He was going to Austin, and my destination was Dallas as daughter lives there. Son was standing in a long line for food (it looked everyone was hungry), while I was waiting way back.

Looking meaninglessly here, and there, I caught sight of BF. I was trying to determine whether he was the same person I thought him to be, all the while giving him sneaky glances.

He was too clever for me. Once he caught on that I was watching him covertly, he would look at the same time I would look at him. I would feel embarrassed at being caught, and look elsewhere. Oh, I dearly wanted to speak to him to ascertain whether he was the same guy I wanted him to be, but at heart I’m so chicken hearted. For the life of me I couldn’t figure out how to speak to a person whom you know figuratively but he may not want to be discovered.

I went, and tapped Son to ask his opinion. Son’s reply was a total No, no. Disappointed I moved back. BF had done the disappearing act.

Ramadan

A happy Ramadan Mubarak to those who are fasting.

Made samosas for Son. They are yet to be fried.

Ramadan is here once again. Every year it moves by ten days ahead. Monday was our first fast. Actually I’m not fasting this year (Son is the one who is fasting), because I’m not well. I had a minor stroke, and was hospitalized.

I have some questions. Why do the nurses extract so much blood from patients in the name of tests? And why do they put a cannula in a place on your arms making it impossible to move your hands. I couldn’t use my right hand. I’m a right handed person. There was one in the crook of my arm making me unable to do eat, and brush my teeth even. I must say it was totally uncomfortable. Oil had splashed on the back of my left hand a day earlier while I was frying something, or the other, forming blisters. The nurses used the back of my left hand to draw out more blood for God knows more testing. So that hand was a painful mess too. Every three hours I would be stoically looking the other way to bear the painful jabs.

My husband passed away almost seven years ago. In August it will be his seventh death anniversary. Before any illness he is there sitting near my head. All this long he never spoke to me directly in my dreams, except for once. The night before I fell sick, he was there holding me, telling me to go to sleep. I was like saying, “No, no I can’t sleep. I have to do this, and I have to do that……”

I’m left wondering if I had gone to sleep, would I have woken up again?

Miserable

Now that I’m immobile, I miss the luxury of movement. Even the simple act of cleaning my surroundings is beyond me. As long I keep my foot elevated, it remains okay, but a simple task as going to the bathroom makes it balloon beyond its’ actual size.

There must be something seriously wrong. If the X-ray didn’t show anything broken, why isn’t my foot getting better? The other foot is getting pain ridden too with the extra effort it’s exerting.

One never knows the importance of good health unless something is taken away.

Never Remembering

How do I go from here to there

How to remember the various odd things

How to hold on, and never forget

Getting out of hands, my memory needs fixing

(Sheen-April2019)

It was last week, before the unfortunate mishap with my left foot. Son needed to have his wedding photos developed for his wife’s visa. I went along with him. I shouldn’t have gone. It’s never a good idea to go to shops. One buys unnecessary things. I had time to browse while I waited for Son, and that was my undoing. It was no excuse for my buying spree.

Coming out I was following Son. I’m a slow person, taking in the view, while Son takes gigantic strides. He gets ahead so quickly that I had difficulty in following him. A couple of people came between him, and me, while I was focusing on them, and how to pass through, I lost him. I couldn’t see where he went.

I kept looking for him, forgetting where the car was parked. We had come in his vehicle, as he wanted to fill his car’s tank. His irritated call soon came, asking where was I? Anyway we found each other.

My sister has found the solution to my forgetfulness, and that is : the moment I get down from the car, I should take a photo of the location.

Unexpected

My car’s front two tires needed to be changed. It came up during the yearly inspection of car maintenance which is a state requirement. It was decided that I should buy new four tires. Son found out the varying prices. Although places away from us were cheaper, I decided to get new ones from a nearby place. This way if there was any trouble with the new ones, we didn’t have to drive fifty, sixty miles away.

Trouble comes in twos, and …….. I don’t want to complete the sentence. You will soon see why? Coming back from the library I twisted my right foot. For a moment there was blinding pain, then I managed to limp to the other side of the road. For the rest of the four hours ahead I did the laundry (going to the fourth floor on stairs) as the washing machine on our floor was on the blink, and other household chores.

I was aiming to get to bed for earning my hard won rest, when my sister’s phone came. I should have made excuses, and gone to bed, but I didn’t. At the end of our hour long chat there was dreadful pain in my right foot. It was awful. Whatever position I tried to ease my foot, the pain wouldn’t go away. That was the moment I told Son at what had happened earlier. Thank God he was home.

There weren’t any pain killers, as Son rummaged through my stash of medicines first, then his own. He went to the nearby Walgreens to get Advil. Downing two of those weren’t any help. The pain kept getting worse. The thought of going through that pain all night made me decide to see a doctor. Leaning heavily on a cane through the searing pain I reached the ground floor level to get into the car.

Thank God it was just a sprain, not any broken bone. I learnt to walk on crutches. If it weren’t for crutches, I don’t know how I would have managed. The next trouble came when I got splattered with hot oil on my left hand, and chest this morning. I’m fearing what will happen next?

Anxiety

As a mother, I always lookout for my children. A minor thing like not going to bed on time has me worried that Son won’t be getting sufficient sleep. I see when it’s getting late, I keep reminding him. It irritates him. Sometimes he listens, at other times he doesn’t.

I had to curtail my habit after our previous altercation. It was Monday night. He had told me that he would be getting up early at three in the morning to leave for his job. As the clock’s needles pushed past ten thirty, I reminded him. He didn’t say anything. Half an hour later, I reminded him again. Nothing doing!

The third time he growled at me, I gave up. Here, I was getting more worried for his sake, and it had no effect on him. Indignant 😠, I wrote a short tirade on my writing pad about his behavior, trying to get rid of my vexation with him. An hour, or so later he called a good night, whereas I didn’t sleep the whole night. Sleepless I didn’t sleep till the morning prayers.

Son wanted me to write down the recent expenses of his marriage. His lawyer had asked him for the details. After writing I handed it over to Son, forgetting the disparaging remarks I had written about him on the same note pad. I had not meant them for his eyes. Imagine my embarrassment when I saw my notepad lying on the table opened on the exact page.