Our N Mamu was, no sorry it’s is (he is still alive) our mother’s half brother. Our mother’s mother died at the birth of our aunt so our grandfather got married again. Our N Mamu was a constant fixture in our life, meaning he would be there at our house whichever way we turned. When he would go back to his home in the village, we would breath a sigh of relief. ‘Good Riddance.’ But sooner or later he would be back.
The thing which irritated us most was that as soon as he reached our home he would come to our school. He would be waiting outside and when we came out from the school building he would rush towards us in broad ‘View’ of our class fellows. I used to die with ‘Mortification’ when it happened. At that moment in life I used to wish I could turn invisible. I would slunk quickly towards our school’s gate to get over the ‘Ordeal’ of my class fellows’s inquisitive gazes. Now to think back what an ‘Obnoxious’ person I was at that moment in time.
To our childish eyes he looked totally inappropriate in his attire. He would be wearing a long shirt and shalwar. In our minds we wanted him dressed more like Elvis or the Beatles or to say we would have loved if he had looked really ‘Cool.’ That was our definition of coolness. He had started growing his mustaches and beard and that caused us more misery in turn. One day we hatched a plan to get rid of Mamu’s mustaches and beard. As usual he was back at our home. That afternoon we made him drink a lot of ‘Lassi.’ Lassi is made of yogurt and water. While Mamu lay down to have an afternoon nap all of us had gathered in his room. Mamu suspiciously eyed us so we dispersed. We waited till we were sure that he was sound asleep, then we took a scissor to his beard. We had cut half of his mustache when he woke up. You can imagine how furious he was. Needless to say Mamu stopped coming to us. I feel deeply ashamed of what we did to him.