The First Day

Tell us about your first day at something — school, work, as a parent, etc.

The first day after husband’s death, I was still numb (had not slept for the last twenty four hours), and thinking that the day was unreal. He would appear somehow, but you know, and I know, no one comes back.

The children, and I had brought his body for burial to his ancestral village a day before. Unlike other religions, Muslims have to bury their dead as soon as possible. Both my children were in the ambulance which was carrying his dead body, and I followed them in the car. We reached at 4pm. Our home in the village had not been visited for a year, and the chowkidar (person who looked after the house) had been negligent in taking care of our home. Can you imagine all the bulbs 💡 outside were missing. It was complete darkness, once the sun 🌞 went down.

It was the month of Ramadan, and people were fasting. He was placed on the side lawn, till preparations were made for his bath. My daughter, and I stood near his head, reciting the Quran. Time was running out, and we knew it was the last time we were seeing him. Tears kept running down my face, and the pages would get blurred. I would wipe the tears, but they wouldn’t stop.

My husband was given a quick bath by Son, and one, or two relatives assisted him., and then enshrouded in white. He was brought back to the side lawn where all the women were sitting, so that daughter, and I could see him for the final time, and say our farewells. He was then taken by Son, and male relatives to the cemetery. He had made me promise that I will take him to the village to be buried. Women are not present at the time of burial. They visit the cemetery the next day after Fajr prayer.

The next day was as surreal as could be. There is a three day mourning period, so people were jam packed on the lawns, and inside the house. Some of them were not fasting, so food had to be prepared for them for lunch, and for the evening Iftari for those who were fasting. My two brother in laws were taking care of the guests, the only thing left to me was paying the bills, once they started coming in.

People who were not there on the first day were there on the next day offering condolences to me, and Son. For me they were just a blur of faces who came, and went.

The Uncaring World

Gaza is the scene of death. There are corpses everywhere, and still the world is a silent spectator watching the genocide. Once everyone has been massacred the Israelis can build their settlements.

Images of helpless people! O God where are you?

Not Certain

List 10 things you know to be absolutely certain.

I’m not certain of anything

Life, and death, and everything

Tears, and laughter from where they come

One minute here, the next minute gone

Sadness, and sorrow why do they come

Why can’t we be forever happy not glum

(Sheen-July2023)

Every time we touch

It’s funny. Listening to the song every time we touch, my eyes fell on one of the comments:

Guess every time we touch

I get the virus

And every time we kiss

I swear I might die

How appropriate to our COVID filled world!

The Last Sunset

I took this photo of sunset last evening in a parking lot.

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Today the sky is slate grey. It’s a gloomy day for sure. It seems to me more so with the sudden death of an an acquaintance’s father. I had met the old couple at their son’s home. They lived with their son. The burial is for tomorrow, and the family is waiting for the couple’s second son to reach Houston in time to see his father for the last time.

To me it’s a sad time to hear about someone dying. It brings home to me that our stay on earth is transient, and at the end everyone is going to leave the earthy abode for someplace else. One friend always used to grumble as to why Adam, and Eve ate from the forbidden tree? If they had not done so, the humans wouldn’t have to get banished to earth, and wouldn’t have suffered death. Her question would make us laugh.

I have noticed that the day death occurs in my family, or those I have known, the weather turns gloomy, and I feel cold.

Does this happens to you too?

October

Everyone has an important month in their life. Mine is October. My wedding happened in it. Nobody planned it that way. My late husband was in a different part of our country. He could only get fifteen days leave, and so whatever date he said he was available for the marriage ceremony, it became the due date.

Another coincidence. My daughter had her Nikah ceremony in the last week of October. We wanted laughter, and gaiety in our midst, and so we made it happen, although her actual wedding date was four years later on. Both she, and her would be husband were students.

My late husband’s date of birth was twenty sixth of October. He graduated from PMA as an army officer on eighteenth of the month. Every year we celebrated the event by getting together for a sumptuous dinner with fellow graduates, and their families. The tradition stopped with his death, as I couldn’t bear to go alone.

One of the saddest thing in my life happened this month too. I lost my mother as a five years old child. She died of a stroke on fifteenth of October. She was twenty eight. There is nothing sadder than children losing their mother when they are too young, and can’t take care of themselves on their own. The world is a cruel place,

Guess what? The planet 🌏 earth became my abode when I was born in the last week of this same month. I can say October belongs to me.

Despicable

First it was Zardari who wanted to gain sympathies of the poor fools (who forget how the wily politicians try to gain their votes, and then forget their promises), by first murdering Benazir Bhutto, and then posturing as the bereaved husband. He even changed his children’s last names to Bhutto. He would place Benazir’s photo every place he sat, stood, or whatever.

Taking a leaf from Zardari’s antics, now it’s Nawaz Sharif’s turn. While Zardari rule has been as a president of Pakistan, Nawaz Sharif (not sharif (pious) as the name indicates) has been a Prime Minister. He recently shamed the country publicly in acknowledging the debacle of terrorism which India accused Pakistan of doing so, and the Indian government themselves staged. I hope, and pray the people chase him with sticks, or shower him with rotten eggs, or tomatoes, when he dares show his face to the public.

It’s laughable Nawaz Sharif spending huge amounts in Pounds currency to keep the dead Kulsum Nawaz (his wife) alive on ventilators in England, just to gain sympathies of the masses to win elections in Pakistan. In his tenure as a Prime Minister he sank Pakistan more deeply into the quagmires of debt than his predecessors.

It will be more beneficial to his dead wife if he gives away that money in charity in her name, or give relief to our poor country in paying the country’s huge debts from IMF.

Please Mr. Nawaz spare us your from your crocodile tears.

Faint

My village home front lawn

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Feeling faint with worry I listened to the phone call from my chowkidar (watchman or caretaker) who looks after my village home in Charsadda, Pakistan. He let me know that my brother in law A had been sick for some time. His wife had died thirteen years earlier. He had no children, and there was no one to take care of him. The chowkidar Hakim wanted me to give him permission to bring A to my home so that he could take care of him.  Barely three days later Hakim wanted me to care of the incurring expenses. Seeing no way out I had to agree to it.

I just don’t understand where has his money gone from his bank account, saving funds, and from his property? He wasn’t poor. Why didn’t Hakim told me earlier, so that I had a talk with A? 

I had gone early to bed a day earlier. Wakened by the phone I listened to the news that A had died. It was night here but the day of 6th November had already dawned back in Charsadda. I had to give permission for the burial expenses, and so on. 

I sometimes think it’s becoming harder to exist, and God piles on to test your faith. Son has been without a job since August. His bills,spousal, and child support has become my responsibility too. I hope Son soon acquire a job, otherwise I don’t know what we are going to do? 

Please pray for us. Thank you.

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DAILY PROMPT

Faint

Write a new post in response to today’s one-word prompt.

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/faint/

Finite

Our life is finite, but we forget

Dreaming our life as we go on living 

We think we have innumerable days

Though we see death stalking

People around us

Till our time to live gets over

And it’s our turn for dying

(Sheen-September2017)

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DAILY PROMPT

Finite

Write a new post in response to today’s one-word prompt.

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/finite/

Elixir

The after world is a mystery

Only solved after death

Sometimes I am sanguine 

At other times I dread

What’s going to happen next?

I pray in the mornings, evenings, and nights

Noons, afternoons, and at other times

The prayers are my elixir

For heaven above

(Sheen-March2017)

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DAILY PROMPT

Elixir

Write a new post in response to today’s one-word prompt.

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/elixir/